Most ridiculous item of the day

Grocery shopping was hell. Apparently, everyone goes grocery shopping at 3 PM on Sunday. There are plenty of items I glance over in the checkout line, like this week's Weekly World News, which had a headline on the cover about aliens settling in San Francisco. But this item took the cake:
Who the hell is this desparate?

"Hey baby, got a light?"

"Yeah, and it's GOT MY NUMBER ON IT! Call me sometime?"

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